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Feb. 16th, 2012 12:12 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
frostbittenscars[Filter: Private]
I think ... I think I'm actually feeling better about this whole thing. I'm not proud of myself, but there was nothing else to do. I love Clara. I can't do anything about this whole war right now, and I'm too alone. It's not like getting closer to her will be a bad thing for me to do. It's what I'm here for! I just ... I don't know what I will do other than just being this. Getting closer to her. I can't see this getting me what I want. I can't get more men. I can't use her influence to attack Keran....
I'm not proud of myself here, just getting closer to her because I'm lonely... But I'm not angry at myself either.
I think ... I think I'm actually feeling better about this whole thing. I'm not proud of myself, but there was nothing else to do. I love Clara. I can't do anything about this whole war right now, and I'm too alone. It's not like getting closer to her will be a bad thing for me to do. It's what I'm here for! I just ... I don't know what I will do other than just being this. Getting closer to her. I can't see this getting me what I want. I can't get more men. I can't use her influence to attack Keran....
I'm not proud of myself here, just getting closer to her because I'm lonely... But I'm not angry at myself either.
