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Jul. 1st, 2010 01:30 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
frostbittenscars[Filter: Private]
I guess I can be as horrible as I want here, and no one's going to read it? Alright, I have to read it, but it's not like I'm going to be disgusted with myself. Like, more than I already am.
Sex was pretty fun for awhile. I mean, I really liked it, and especially since it was something I never thought I'd get to do when Keran came barging in. (Guess it could have been MUCH worse.... ugh.) And Timothy was a pretty cool guy about the whole thing, and knew it wasn't going to last forever. And everything was great.
And then I was a giant ass and ruined everything. Everything! I know Tim misses using his hands. It tooks months to realise he's not really going to... Anyway, that's when all the guilt started. He didn't mind me having sex with another guy, or at least not that he said. It was all for show. But after... I couldn't really say no to the guy I'd just got mutilated, could I? Ugh! Guilt! There wasn't anything very fun about it after that, it was just me doing all the work.
And now he expects it, and what am I going to do? I still like sex. He's just not doing anything for me anymore... I'm getting tired of being a giant chamberpot for him to shoot seed into. If I want any satisfaction anymore I have to get it myself! And I'm not thinking of him while I'm doing it either!
So tempted to be done with it any just tell him to get a whore. I am so dumb...
I guess I can be as horrible as I want here, and no one's going to read it? Alright, I have to read it, but it's not like I'm going to be disgusted with myself. Like, more than I already am.
Sex was pretty fun for awhile. I mean, I really liked it, and especially since it was something I never thought I'd get to do when Keran came barging in. (Guess it could have been MUCH worse.... ugh.) And Timothy was a pretty cool guy about the whole thing, and knew it wasn't going to last forever. And everything was great.
And then I was a giant ass and ruined everything. Everything! I know Tim misses using his hands. It tooks months to realise he's not really going to... Anyway, that's when all the guilt started. He didn't mind me having sex with another guy, or at least not that he said. It was all for show. But after... I couldn't really say no to the guy I'd just got mutilated, could I? Ugh! Guilt! There wasn't anything very fun about it after that, it was just me doing all the work.
And now he expects it, and what am I going to do? I still like sex. He's just not doing anything for me anymore... I'm getting tired of being a giant chamberpot for him to shoot seed into. If I want any satisfaction anymore I have to get it myself! And I'm not thinking of him while I'm doing it either!
So tempted to be done with it any just tell him to get a whore. I am so dumb...
